My Brief Health Scare

I haven't written blogs for a while. I just haven't had the energy to address my brief little health scare that came on with no warning and consumed half my life. It all started when I was reading a magazine one morning...

I read an article about a woman who, while drinking a glass of wine one night, discovered that she had intense pain in her lymph nodes. 'Hey,' I thought, 'That's just like me!' You see, I, too, experience pain in my jaw and neck lymph nodes when I drink alcohol. I don't drink very often, so it really was not a big concern for me. But here's this article, and I figured I would keep reading and find out why I would have this pain. Turns out this woman discovered that pain in the lymph nodes when you drink alcohol is a symptom quite specific to Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Wow. Interesting. 'Okay,' I thought, my heart racing, 'Surely there are other reasons for this. Surely I'm not walking around completely healthy except for some lymphoma!' So I googled it. And I got a million sites that talked about lymphoma. So I re-googled. And googled again. I phrased it in all different ways: "pain in neck with beer," "lymph nodes hurt wine," "alcohol and lymph nodes," and so on. And each and every time my computer popped up a screen with a long list of lymphoma sites. Ugh. And so began the doctor visits.

I went to one doctor who didn't even feel all of my lymph nodes or run the one blood test that might indicate lymphoma (sed rate). He just told me to come back if I felt any lumps. I talked to a nurse friend of mine who set me up with her best friend, who happens to be a wonderful internist. I had a complete physical, an abdominal ultrasound, a round of x-rays, and one more round of blood work. All of this to tell me I have absolutely no signs of cancer! Whew! Excellent!! But meanwhile, in the month it took me to have all these tests, I faced the very scary thought of cancer. On the one hand, Hodgkin's Lymphoma (HL) has one of the highest cure rates of any cancer. Caught early it has something like a 95% survival rate. On the other hand, someone has to fall into that other 5%, right? I thought about going through chemo, radiation, biopsies, and such. I thought about telling my kids, who already lost an uncle to lymphoma a few years ago. My husband was scared, I was scared - we knew the chances of me having it were slim, but still - every time I googled, I came up with HL, HL, and more HL. When the results came in that everything looked normal, the whole family took a collective sigh of relief.

I am so thrilled to know that I don't have it! I still don't know why I have the pain when I drink, but since I'm not a big drinker, I'm not that worried about it. And now I've got the heads up - I check my lymph nodes in the shower at least once a week. The doctor suggested I do it every month when I do my breast exam, but I'm still too paranoid to wait a full month - I can't help but check myself. So, I know that I will know immediately if there are any changes in my lymph nodes. And, I also have 2 complete sets of blood work so if I do need more blood work in the future, I will have something for comparison. Again, HL has a wonderful outlook when you catch it early, so I'm comforted to know that if I do get it, it will be an early prognosis. And hopefully I'll die when I'm 100 years old, having never had HL, and I'll probably die with one hand on my lymph nodes, living forever in paranoia! And that's okay. Sometimes a little bit of worry is a good thing.

In the meantime, all this stress has soured my stomach a bit and I've lost 8 pounds! Woo hoo!! I'm hoping to keep it off, and with the cooler fall weather, I plan on resuming my walking/running again. Here's to getting fit before the holidays hit!

America, America, God Shed His Grace on Thee

Where has true patriotism gone? I am on facebook quite a bit, and am getting discouraged at all of the snide and negative comments about our country and it's politicians. I love being American. I love the freedom that comes with that honor. I love the fact that if I disagree with a politician or a policy that I can voice my opinion, cast my vote, start a grass roots movement - or anything else I decide I'd like to do. I am not trying to take away anybody's right to free speech. I just miss the days when once the election was over, you were respectful of the President. Agree or disagree, people were respectful. I miss the days when soldiers held the awe of children who saw them. I miss when everyone took their hats off when soldiers marched by, when you put your hand over your heart when the National Anthem came on. And when the opening notes started to play, nobody was texting or chatting or answering calls. Nobody was laughing or jeering Congress. Nobody did anything except put their hands over their hearts and tried to swallow that lump in their throat.

I wish everyone felt as passionately about their country as they do about their cell phones. I wish as many people voted for Congress as voted for American Idol. I wish God and country meant as much today as it did 100 years ago. My grandparents taught me a lot about patriotism. My parents taught me a lot about being outspoken for your views, and staying politically active. I hope I can pass all of that and more along to my kids.

I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America.

And to the republic, for which it stands,

One nation, Under God,

Indivisible,

With liberty, and justice for all.

Amen.