Fruit kills

They say fruit is good for you, but I was almost killed by an errant strawberry yesterday. I was in the lunchroom getting all the lunches fixed, when a strawberry came out of nowhere! It was left from morning snack, but I'm pretty sure it hid behind a table leg and waited for me. I stepped on the strawberry, slipped and fell. But it wasn't one of those uneventful little plops onto the floor - oh no. It was a grandiose spectacle. A debacle of comic proportions! My feet flew out from under me and I hit the floor, knee first. On the way down, my left elbow went right into a pudding cup - chocolate pudding went everywhere. My right hand hit a bowl of macaroni and cheese - the Chef Boy'R Dee kind with all the liquid, not the good homemade kind that stays in one big, cheesy clump - and macaroni went flying. I lay there for just a minute, contemplating how much damage I had done to myself. My first thought was that I was going to have to go to the doctor. My knee was in excruciating pain. My second - almost immediate - thought was that I hadn't shaved my legs since Saturday, so how embarrassing was that going to be? The good news is that I got up and was able to walk and bend my leg and all that good stuff. I cleaned up the mess, served lunch to 30 kids, and made it through the day with ice packs and ibuprofen. It's one day later and I feel better, even though my knee looks disgusting - people actually wince when they see it. But as Dr. C told me, it's all soft tissue damage, so it will be sore for several days, then heal up nicely.

So nice try, strawberry, but I won this battle. And next time someone tries to tell you to eat more fruit, remember ... fruit is evil.